A Warm Hug

I thought I would share how the Lord blessed me special this morning. These are some inserts I jotted down in my journal. I woke up this morning with a migraine(second day in a row) it was early and I went to look out the kitchen window. It was a pretty morning and as I looked it didnt take but a second before I feel like the veil over my heart was lifted and the eyes of my heart were opened. All of a sudden the knowledge in my head made a 12 inch journey to my heart. I WAS WHERE I WAS SUPPOSE TO BE (not only in Missouri but life !) . Not only that but I am WHO I am suppose to be. If that doesnt make sense then let me explain-ever since I moved here I knew in my head that we were following the only path open-so it must be Gods will. So in my head I knew we were in the will of God-then again in the study of Esther it was confirmed yet again that we were NOT on a detour, but we were at our destination for this time in our life. That was amazing to me that God would confirm that to me-and then in my new study I am learning all about walking by faith-letting faith be my eyes and the treasures in the darkness Isaiah 45:3. Well in the midst of" knowing" all of that now-there was still a block between the Lord and I- because I still couldnt wrap my mind around the move. I was still trying to control. I also felt like I missed so much of my life with all the unemployment and was trying to play catch up and clean up of all the mistakes which had been made. And to top that off-here I am At this age in my life starting over-so much I want to do (if it was only 10 years earlier!)-so I wasnt free to be me -I was trying to attain to be all the people I needed to be to be validated as a person of my age and a Christian. This morning I was given a gift of deliverance of analysis. God confirmed to my spirit that HE was in control of everything and everything was All RIGHT. I didnt have to do anything but be who I am, and it is good -not only good but GOOD ENOUGH! I understand that if I never went anywhere or do anything else other than what I am doing now then that is where I am suppose to be. Before I would see all the others that life went along as they planned and they accomplished all I assumed I would accomplish-but now I feel free from that bondage of comparing and analysis and feeling less of a christian. Living in the "tree of knowledge of good and evil" vs the "tree of life" can be death to your soul. There is never(for the most part) an answer to your hard questions. So my challenge is to continue to walk in the spirit and not be subject to the things of the flesh that exalt itself against the knowledge of God. In other words Be still and know that He is God. I am only annointed to be me(ordinary me) and that is cool-that is enough. I dont have to worry about the unattainable things in my life-if God wants them in my life they will happen because He will make them happen in His way-if not then I dont need them and It is allright! That is very freeing. I am not defined by what I see in the mirror -but only the mirror of God's word. This was HUGE to me. I dont have to take myself so seriously or care what other's opinion of me is-All He calls me to be is who I am (with all my strengths and faults). He only wants us to live in the here and now-that is why it is called the "present". Giving Him our best-He will take care of the rest. One last thing, is my devotional I read this morning talked about the lilies of the field. Living simply and focused -the lilies dont toil or spin, they simply ARE-yet what a ministry and service they render to us. We dont have to focus on all the "to do's" to be useful- but on Him-and out of that will flow rivers of living waters. So my final thought is I have been given a huge gift of revelation from God that all along His hand has been upon my family and I just have to rest in Him and know that He is God and I am not and I find peace in that. If I never accomplish anything of the "extras" in life-Im ok knowing that I answer to Him only and He is in control and is pleased with me where I am. That was my warm hug today from God. I can honestly says that the walls have been torn down. May I always live in the tree of life only! Based on my temperment it will be a battle-but I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me!